All I can do is pray for her to find the same kind of love in her heart for herself that I have found,
.
I chose to love her from afar and will not allow her co-dependency to rule my life just because it's destroying hers...
a must read: "Co-dependency No More"...it will explain a lot about SEVERE codependency and talks about how real it is as an illness...
don't forget that whoever you are, you are amazing and wonderful and that you deserve the best love and support- if you can't get it, rather than fight it, accept it, and never stop giving it...
don't forget that whoever you are, you are amazing and wonderful and that you deserve the best love and support- if you can't get it, rather than fight it, accept it, and never stop giving it...
It's my philosophy right now...
Learning to let go of my expectations has been unbelievably freeing- Especially when it comes to someone very close to me.
Being who she is is all she knows.
I will never change her. I can not expect to.
I will never understand her. I can not expect to.
I will learn from her and because I chose to learn from her I will grow... so that is all I CAN take.
One day I hope to be able to forgive her ....
... but for now I am focusing on forgiving myself...
...and it's a work in progress,
believe me.
Very insightful.
ReplyDeleteMy friend Melodie has a term for people like the woman you refer to. It's called a 'toxic personality' ... the type of personality that you really do end up 'caring about from afar' because having interaction with them ends up being toxic for any individual that's trying to improve themselves.
I give you props for not hating this person. And for attempting to understand why she is the way she is and take away from the set of experiences that you don't ever want to be that way/nor will ever become as she is.
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ReplyDeleteI have to make an ammends.... I deleted some passages that were inappropriate and becaue I didn't have facts right- I hurt people close to me- I left the parts about forgiving because that is really why imposter it innitially- so I am truly sorry.... I am a work in progress.
ReplyDeleteLove you. :)
ReplyDelete